What DO I Like?

(September 17, 2008)

It's 1:15 on a normal Wednesday and I'm at work. Am I working? HELL NO! Well, kinda. I did have a long meeting first thing this morning (mostly my co-worker venting about our crazy-ass boss and what we can do to save him from himself), then I packed up some spare hard drives for our Sydney office, and now, before I launch into an invoicing project that'll take at least an hour, I'm loafing. With coffee.

"Loafing with coffee." Among my favorite states-of-being. Would that I could loaf with coffee all the time...*sigh*

So, the new sofa (see Apartment Therapy 2) will be delivered on Friday. Since I already took off last Monday for the big "recon mission" (seeing it in person and sitting on it to make sure it doesn't suck) Joe will take Friday to wait for the delivery guys.

Anybody want a wrought-iron daybed? Free to good home. Will be dismantled on Thursday night during America's Got Talent.

I hope I can dismantle the daybed myself. It's been "mantled" for so long now, in the same spot since 2003. Hub and I bought it in, I want to say '99. Or 2000. I know that Lola was in the states, back from Paris for a visit, and she and her dude stayed in the guest bedroom and that's what they slept on, the daybed, and that Hub and I bought it just for having something comfortable for our first overnight guests. Lola had a cold, I remember that, and I think I had a New Year's party.

I could look it up easily in the Diary archives, as it was the year Barney died. Best cat ever, he died a few days after Lola left.

It's been dismantled and moved a number of times 'lo these many years since its purchase, but Hub always did it. I know the job requires an Allen key, and anything requiring an Allen key I can usually do without much trouble.

Hm. An odd little societal class indicator. Allen keys, also known as hex keys or Allen wrenches. Poor people are good with Allen keys. Rich people probably have no idea what it is...you see Mr. Moneybags, when you buy prefab DIY furniture, it arrives in a flat, narrow box...

I myself have a full set of Allen keys in my toolbox.

For someone whose income level demands Allen key furniture, I am such a snob about decor. I realized the depth of my disdain for certain "looks" when I was at Homegoods in Somerville hunting a very specific item (a dark wood mail organizer for the side table). I found exactly what I wanted almost right away, but kept shopping because I couldn't resist -- I LOVE Homegoods.

It was whilst browsing the chairs, armoires, bedding, throw pillows, wall shelves, kitchen accoutrements and endless one-off decorative tchotchkes, baubles, gadgets, trinkets and gewgews.

I haughtily dismiss a great number of items that plenty of people would find perfectly adorable.

My decor rejection primary factor may be, though I haven't officially verified this with myself, any decorative motif that my mother had used -- something that doesn't make too much sense because I tend to buy, in food items, her same brands of canned tomatoes, olive oil and so forth.

But in decor? I go the other way.

Kitchen: No chickens, no roosters -- mother had a "chicken collection" that got way out of hand. I want no barnyard fowl. In fact, no birds or birdlike things at all, thank you. No cows, no sheep -- no livestock animals of any sort. No woven baskets. No dried flowers, reeds or grasses. Nothing made from/to look like the slats of a picket fence. Nothing involving chicken wire. Nothing that could be described as "rustic" or "country."

Living Room: No gourds. No leopard, tiger, zebra or any other jungle print. No batik or batik knock-offs, no mud cloth. No bamboo, no wicker, no rattan -- any kind of woven furniture is right out. No sheepskin. No glass-topped tables or shelves. No wooden carvings in the shape of giraffes, elephants or anything else that roams the vast African savanna. No fake tribal-looking musical instruments. No fake ritual masks from non-existent lost villages.

If you're now envisioning my mother's house as an African-inspired living room and bedroom with a "country kitchen," it's about right. There was also a creamer collection...lots and lots of coffee creamers.

Other styles that were NOT in our house but that I reject out of hand: No Asian-inspired black lacquered anything, especially furniture. No ceramic figurines of any kind, especially the shiny dancing lady variety. No fruit -- nothing printed with or shaped like apples, strawberries, lemons, etc. Nothing nautical -- no seashells, no coral, no driftwood, no jaunty life preservers saying "Welcome!" or sugar canisters that look like lighthouses. No obnoxious florals.

No turquoise.

What DO I like?

I like...lizards. I do. I like whimsy. Alice in Wonderland. Classic Hollywood. Lucille Ball. Old product advertisements. And spirals, I find comfort in spirals. Rich solid reds and deep greens, accents of warm golds, orange like sunsets. Stars. Plenty of light. Trees and plants. Dark woods like mahogany and cherry. Textiles that are soft, velvety. Plush things. I guess if money and space were no object, I'd like to decorate around the colors and shapes of Gustav Klimt.