I Figured Out...

(May 17, 2007)

...that I really fucking love The Cranberries. Sometimes this shit sneaks up on you, but it's like years later (I mean YEARS since I first bought their first CD) and every time I'm reminded of "Zombie" or "Linger" I'm off on a tear singin' the damn thing. Complete with the little yodel affectation. Yep.

...that this summer will be the five year Enoversary for me and Joe. Five! And how many treasures I've gained since I found him! Just...a lot of stuff. He's my JoeyBear and it's ridiculous, the amount love I carry around, all for him.

...that I'll never "have time" to go to the gym, so I had better "make time."

...the Boston Herald pisses me off, and sometimes I buy a copy just to make sure that's still true. Like today. They think the big cover story is that some state reps have expensive business cards. Fucking Herald.

...you can never have too many tea candles. I thought I had too many tea candles, then the power got shut off in our building. It seems that the big rains from yesterday crashed through the roof and created a torrent down through the center of the building. The fire department came, Keyspan came, the water company came, but we were without power until today. Though I did go to CVS last night to get some bigger candles, the enormous sack of tea candles came in quite handy.

...that there actually is an expression that sounds dumber than "thingy" in place of the actual noun. Two somethings, in fact. And those two somethings are the terms "jobbyjob" and "linkylink."

...speaking of "linkylinks," have you seen Twitter.com? If not, take a moment. Seriously, I'll wait. Did you do it? You did? So you saw the missison statement? If you didn't go there, it's okay, I'll tell you the mission statement. It's: "A global community of friends and strangers answering one simple question: What are you doing? Answer on your phone, IM, or right here on the web!" So basically, if you add Twitter to your probably-already-too-full-plate of online activities, you'll be interrupting your day constantly to issue such scintillating missives as: "I'm on the bus going home." You know what? If you have that kind of time, good luck, my friend. I think I'll just start up www.ColossalWasteOfTime.com and start my own SMS feed of web clogging sludge. Because, oh my GOD, what a fucking colossal waste of time. If I had kids, I'd make sure they Jaiku'd or Twitter'd me on their way home from school and while they were out with their friends, etc. Keep a virtual eye on them. I'd also put one of those tracking devices on my kid. I do not, however, give a flying fuck in a high wind what Steve in Centerville, Ohio is having for breakfast.

Fuck. I had more but that Twitter thing is so fucking stupid that I can't even think of what else I was going to catch you all up on.