|
******* You're reading an old entry from Michelle "Lexi Kahn" DiPoala's online diary, formerly called Jungle Sweet Jungle. Blog name changed to Low Budget Superhero in October 2005. Now I mostly go by SuperLowBudge. You can call me Lexi, Michelle or SuperLowBudge, or if you're my mom, then Shelly. Enjoy these old posts (except if you're my mom.) Please follow on Blogger at superlowbudge.blogspot.com. From there you can follow me on Twitter and some other platforms. Thanks!
|
You've Got... (June 15, 2000) Lord a'mighty am I busy; hoppin' like a long tailed cat in a roomful o' rockin' chairs. Bad news. My boss moved me into a larger office that actually has a real wall-- okay only one, the other three are cube walls. But hey, that's still a hemi-cube instead of the usual dehumaniza-cube. Worse news: he got me a laptop and a pager. I mean, I HAD a pager but I bequeathed it to the poor coffee-torqued chick who succeeded me in my last insane role at this fine asylum. So for two years (in my not-so-new-anymore role) I've been beep-free. Yay! 'Til now. Fu... Pagers these days are interactive and can email, call, or page another pager. The first thing I did was "call" Hub from it, with the message, "Fert." It's not a word or anything, it's just that this is a tiny little keyboard! And those were the letters I pressed. He picked up the phone at home (the fucker gets to work at home among kitties) and and Marvin the Robot's voice said, "Bell south mes age. Sub ject: fert. Good bye." The page came back, "fert THIS!" It was the quintessential Gen X moment. Dang. Okay so back to the bad news: Doesn't it seem like bossman thinks I'm going to start working from home at all hours like HE does? Laptop, are ya kidding? I hope these people realize that I'm not "driven" or "overachieving." Anymore. I kinda frittered away my twenties hunkered over spreadsheets and sweating presentations and growing a great big ass. Now I just want to go to the Lizard Lounge to see Francine and The Gravy. Maybe find my real ass after all. It's small and round and cute and it's here somewhere, I tell ya. Actually that stupid pager came in pretty handy last week. My friend Aaron was coming over, and instead of being home in 45 minutes to see him, y'know, make some tea, shoot the poopy? Not to be had. It took me 45 minutes just to go three miles. Great. It's not like I see this darling boy every day. So of course my cell phone battery was dead. I was just about to shrug, "oh well,sucks bein' me" when I remembered the pager. "Bell south mes age. Sub ject: traf fic. 45 min utes in traf fic. Sor ry." Hey kids, now I can blow off my friends electronically!
. . . . .
|