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You're reading an old entry from Michelle "Lexi Kahn" DiPoala's online diary, formerly called Jungle Sweet Jungle. Blog name changed to Low Budget Superhero in October 2005. Now I mostly go by SuperLowBudge. You can call me Lexi, Michelle or SuperLowBudge, or if you're my mom, then Shelly. Enjoy these old posts (except if you're my mom.) Please follow on Blogger at superlowbudge.blogspot.com. From there you can follow me on Twitter and some other platforms. Thanks!
Fuzzbusting
(July 8, 2003)
"I saw one of those on like, late night infomercial TV," Hub said. "It showed all these women sandblasting their faces with this little spinning buffer, and it said 'Completely safe!' I was like, 'Oh come on, it is NOT.'"
"Well the one I got isn't like that one. Nothings spins. It's just a little purple rubber thing, about the size and feel of a kid's rubber eraser, like if you got a My Little Pony eraser. Then there're these...they call them SilCoat Strips. Sticky on one side, and the other is kind of like rough sandpaper. You stick one to the rubber thing. Then you're supposed to rub it on your unwanted hair to remove it."
"Yeah and how's that going?"
"I tried it on my lip area. My skin now feels a little sting-y, but the hair's still there."
"Of course! Because that doesn't remove HAIR."
"Maybe I'm not doing it right. It says 'Remove the protective backing and place Facial Strip on the Facial Buffer applicator. With one hand, pull skin back, keeping it smooth and taut. Gently buff the Facial Buffer over the skin in an alternating clockwise/counterclockwise motion...'"
"Great."
"'...after buffing away all unwanted hair, wash your face with cold water and apply mild cream if necessary.'"
"I'm sure."
"Maybe I'm not rubbing enough...Ow! Oh. It also says 'Excessive rubbing may cause abrasions to the skin.'"
"Ya think? Jesus. I'll have to see this contraption of death."
"All I wanted was an easier way to deal with potential Italian-girl lip fuzz."
"I have fuzz everywhere. Sasquatch."
"Um, hello? A)I know WAY hairier guys and 2) The penis gives you carte blanche for fuzz."
Jesus! Hair removal products should all say "No Pain, No Chemicals, No Mess...pick two." If it seems too good to be true, it is.
Don't buy this:
. . . . .