Though you can still call me Lexi Kahn, I'm pulling a Cougar/Mellencamp move and re-identifying. My name is Michelle. I live in Boston, by way of New York, by way of a tiny town in Connecticut. I live with Joe. We're DINKS (dual income, no kids). It's a miracle I have made it to my thirties. Thirties! I am SO a Gen X'er -- go ahead, ask me about the 80s. I love good books, good movies, divine food, leisurely travel, smart comedy and, especially, music. For 11 years ('97 to '08) I was a regular in the local Boston rock scene using the name Lexi Kahn (Google me!) but quit the whole thing to pursue other interests. What those are...is probably what this diary will be about from 2008 forward.
So keep reading! You never know what'll happen.
Some industrious soul just found the Jungle when he/she used Google to look up "english contraction's." P'raps I'm just too dull-wittedly bone tired, but right now I think this is tragically, hilariously funny.
For those of you not yet laughing, shaking your head, or at least rolling your eyes, no fear, I'll over-explain with charts and graphs and *footnotes, and in so doing, suck the very life out of the funny.
See, the plural of contraction is contractions. No apostrophe. The apostrophe makes it a possessive. The Google-searcher is using the wrong form. To wit:
There are twelve cats on my head.
Please don't drink the cat's milk.
So, the funny is, this Google-searcher, bless their wayward little soul, KNOWS they don't know how to do it, and is looking to the Internet for help in proper usage of the apostrophe, and, in the very search itself, demonstrate that yes, they in fact DO need help. See, it's like, circular logic regarding the very thing itself. Ipso facto. Or not. I don't know, it's just funny to me, that's all.
But now I feel bad, because what they FOUND was the entry where I rail against the bloody awful lack of attention to crap like this in the English-speaking world. (If ESL, you catch a break, but only a small one. This isn't verb-form stuff or crazy vowel-sound stuff-- the apostrophe rule is hard and fast.)
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It's opening night.
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*There is a prize for the first Guestbook Signer identifying the source of this Jungle Sweet Jungle entry title.
