What would Peter Occhiogrosso do?

(January 28, 2001)

Yay, Saturday afternoon. Lazy, long, tea-and-music, brush-the-cats, lounge-around Saturday afternoon. Remember when you were a little kid? The glorious relief of the first day of summer vacation? Well, this is not the same thing at all, but it's the most I can get. I have to go to The Kirkland later because I promised I would, but for right now I can sit here in my underwear, write, and listen to my new CDs.

On my way home from The Noise today I stopped at Hi Fi to get the new Red Telephone and Count Zero CDs. Last night was Count Zero's CD release show at Lilli's but I didn't have enough money to get the CD, because I didn't expect a ten dollar cover. Jeez.

Bleu and Quick Fix were on the bill too. And that brings me to today's conundrum: I want to review the show...but I can't review the show. And it's all for political reasons...which IRKS me, that I have to worry about politics in rock, too. Don't I get enough of that at GoToHell Networks all week?

Bleu went on first. Bleu's band is fantastic. He's a quirky, charismatic front man and they rock with an Aztec Camera-like intensity. Good stuff.

Count Zero went on third. Count Zero is in a class by themselves when it comes to sophisticated, smart pop. They had some technical problems with the keyboards, but Count Zero at half mast beats most bands' best night.

Quick Fix went on smack in the middle.

Here's the thing. I've gently mocked Quick Fix in print twice before, and at some point the guys (or the scary label guy that emailed me haughtily after one of the reviews) are going to demand to know why I keep coming to the shows if I don't like the band? Well, why did I watch the horribly bad "Yes Dear" last Monday night? Because it was sandwiched between two shows I like, "King of Queens" and "Everybody Loves Raymond," and I was too lazy to get up and do something else. Or in this case, Everybody Loves Count Zero So Much They Stayed To Watch Quick Fix Whisper Into The Mike And Lick Stuff.

It's not even that I don't like the band...well alright, it is that I don't like the band, but not for the usual reasons like poor musicianship or bad showmanship. In fact, Quick Fix are all astonishing musicians (except for the new bass player, I don't know what he's doing). But the lead singer/guitar player is something to watch. And as far as showmanship, they put it all out on the line. For you to touch. And lick.

See, they're all about this vinyl-clad, skin-tight, wet, ready, hard, heavily-made up, slicked-down glam thing. To go with the look and the show is your run-of-the-mill arena rock songs. The performance, from smoke machine to singing style, is all over-the-top. How do you take it seriously? How does Jake rhyme every word with "pow wow"? When Jake sings-- eyes half closed and tongue flicking-- the words "Devil's Daughter" they come out "Dow vow Dow tow...." My cat Casey could sing lead for Quick Fix. "Meow wow row wow�."

People love it-- and I can sorta see WHY they love it-- but it just doesn't ring true for me.

In fact, I find it hysterical. I find it as funny as Spinal Tap. I crack the fuck up.

Last night I found myself edging further and further back from the stage as the set progressed. As the last song started I found myself out in the hallway talking with the coat check girl. She looks just like the Little Red-Haired Girl that stole Charlie Brown's heart. She let me take Bleu's poster and I went home and pinned it to my wall.